From Tots to Teens ~ I Said YES!

To Jesus entering my heart 5 yrs ago.

To Jesus ruling our home and lives.

To God who called us to adopt two sweet boys.

To God who called again to adopt a 4 yr old littler girl.

To God who called again to adopt a newborn baby boy.

To God who called again to adopt his baby sister.

To God who called only two months after she was ours to adopt a 4 yr old boy.

I said yes, over and over again. Even when at times I wanted to say no.

Saying yes meant I would enter into a deep relationship with God – doing things His way and NOT mine.

Saying yes meant I would learn to trust God like I have never trusted anyone or anything.

Saying yes meant I would learn the spiritual law personally that you reap what you sow – sometimes quickly but always in abundance.

Saying yes meant I would learn what it means to die to self (selfishness) and become the new creation He made me the moment I became His.

Saying yes meant I would no longer live for me but for Him.

Saying yes meant that when I forgot about what it meant to say yes, He would remind me.

Saying yes meant that I would learn all about mercy, grace, healing and love!

Saying yes also meant that I would learn how and when to say no.

I said yes once again last year when God called to say another child was waiting to me ours.

I said yes when God showed me the deepest and darkest places of my heart that He wanted to shine His light into before she came home.

I said yes when God used my trip to the distant land where she was waiting to bring me to my knees for His children and people that are rejected by their country.

A mother and her child lay naked in only a blanket sleeping on the street.

I said yes when God asked me to be a voice for the voiceless and walk silently by their side from my home daily in prayer

Today I praise God as He is moving mountains for these precious people, and bringing others alongside whose voices would be heard across this land.

Check out Project 61 and Help 4 Korah.

Saying yes sometimes hurts.

Saying yes can be very scary.

Saying yes caused me to look at myself in a way I never have before.

Saying yes brought healing that I have longed to receive and never found.

Saying yes taught me what faith really looks like and what it doesn’t.

Saying yes taught me about humility.

Saying yes taught me about strength – not in myself but in HIM ALONE!

Saying yes taught me to let go of everything I once held dear and thank God for what He calls priceless – loving me and me loving Him!

Saying yes taught me that I need Him for everything and without Him being the mother He called me to be is impossible!

Saying yes has taught me the greatest lessons in life about love, marriage, give and take, respect and honor.

Saying yes has taught me to listen – not to what I want to hear – but what He wants to say and teach me.

Saying yes taught me that first time obedience to God is a must or I will reap the consequence of my choice to disobey Him.

And that is where I am today.

I have learned to say yes to God when He is telling me it is time to say no.

For the last month I have felt God ask me to let go of some things so that I would have room for the things He wanted me to be focusing on more.

I couldn’t seem to find the time to have my posts ready for the schedule here on Totally Tots. I didn’t even know what I would write about until sometimes two days before because that is how it works for me when I am waiting to hear from God on topics to share here or on our family blog.

Our family is walking on a new journey, one that is drawing us ever so close to God and each other. This journey needs my focus and time. I am being called to a new level of helpmate (wife) and mother. I am being refined in ways that nothing else could. I am being washed by the power of His love, His word and truth! I am learning to live under His grace, powered by His love and walk step by step in faith wherever this journey leads us.

My hope in sharing this with you is this:

#1 That you will desire to say yes to God no matter what He is asking you. He is faithful. He will get you through it. He will sustain you, strengthen you and empower you for every detail along the way.

#2 That you too will learn that saying no to the world and everything it says is important, is actually saying YES TO GOD being the LORD of your life.

#3 That you will teach your children to listen for God’s still soft voice and obey whatever He asks of you. They learn by what is caught more than what is taught. Let your words be few and your actions speak volumes!

#4 That you don’t have to be a yes person to everyone and every ministry – nor should we be yes parents all of the time (if we do, it stops God from being able to provide what He desires to give us and knows is best!). That you only need be a YES person to GOD. The Author and Finisher of our faith.

#5 That you will desire to walk worthy of His love for us and grace that He pours out – which I stand in awe over, because truly none of us are worthy.

#6 That you will grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior so deeply your life will become a living testimony of His faithfulness, and love for you.

I am thankful for the time I spent preparing each post for Totally Tots and blessed by this group of godly women. I look forward to following along here and will guest post as the Lord leads and tells me yes.

Until then friends – shine on and I pray you will continue to follow along our journey walking on the good path, the lighted road ahead and the place I love to call home – His loving arms which hold me up every single day!

From Tots to Teens ~ Anyone Else Dealing with...

Parenting 9 children is a blessing, challenging, fun, exciting, never boring and some days down right HARD!

As I have shared with you our family is focusing on LOVE IS AN ACTION WORD!

We are reading and studying the epistles of John over and over again with my husband each night.

I am reading and studying through Romans.

Each morning after breakfast I have begun to do our morning bible study again. It has been way too long since we have done this before our day begins. Yes we sing praise songs daily, learn bible verses together and have nightly bible study under Scott’s teaching…and then God impressed upon my heart to begin our day together in His word.

I didn’t realize how much I needed this time with the children or how much they needed it with me – really HIM! The children are so excited to sit together after breakfast to read the Word together and I wake up excited to do it with them.

They all have their bibles next to them at breakfast ready and waiting for us to begin.

We talked for a while lately about sin knocking at the door of their hearts and minds all day long – that they have a choice – either to be a friend or foe to each other and God.

They must choose to walk with God or alone each day.

They must choose to ask the Holy Spirit to lead their day or allow their desires to rule the day.

During a recent bible study I was reminded that I am laying seeds and watering them daily and that I may not see the fruit or harvest from the kind of training we are doing for years. That does discourage me some days and I must remember they are His first and He is faithful – that everything of Him we pour in will NOT return void!

We have a few children that are seriously CHOOSING to walk in their sins all day long. We have a few children that are whining more than this mommy can stand to listen to. We have a few children that would rather be corrected than obey. We have a few children that can’t help but use their mouths to sin against each other – being bossy, mean, tattle telling and lie.

You see the problem is not whether or not they know the rules or what is right from wrong – they all know our house rules and it hangs in our kitchen!

Again, I explained to them it is a choice whether or not they live by them. They have the power to have victory over sin – the Holy Spirit is in them. They all have the freedom from sin and the bondage to it – Jesus paid the price for their sins!

And so I prayed for God to rule and reign in our hearts and home today. That we as a family will choose to do it God’s way and not our own. It is a daily choice to live out Romans 12:1-2. I pray that I as I seek to do it – our children will in turn follow after me. I pray that they see me do what I say and teach – more and more each day.

Choosing to walk in His ways!

From Tots to Teens ~ I Am a Mom

I am a Mom,

Yes that’s a fact!

Nine children call me “Mom”,

Each day a thousand times.

They rise early,

Thirsty and hungry – with smiles on their face.

Laundry piles fill our mud-room,

Dirty hands and faces, clothes and messes everywhere that I look.

Three meals and snacks for 11 each day,

a skill that took much practice to get it right.

They still ask for more morning and night!

A big praise has come - Potty training is done,

No more wipes, diapers or smells that are no fun.

Seven and a half years of that was more than enough,

and I praise God the training was not too rough!

One week for two toddlers is all it took!

I am a teacher,

Yes, that’s a fact too.

Six eager students,

who want to learn how to draw closer to You!

They love history, math and science facts,

I talk very silly during lessons and make them laugh.

They love reading and spelling and grammar too,

So much to teach and things to do!

We will visit neat places and take field trips galore,

Leaving their minds and hearts asking for more.

I will work on their hearts more than anything,

Because learning to love like Jesus is true wisdom and makes God’s heart sing.

I am a wife,

Yes a fact that I love!

To a man who loves God and our family more than anything!

I learn from his wisdom and listen more than I speak,

He is always strong when I become weak!

I praise God for his discernment,

and how it keeps us under God’s wing.

His love for our family,

Makes my heart sing!

I am a Mom,

the toughest job in the world!

A calling so great,

my skills mean nothing it is all about God’s grace!

I hear all the time, “How do you do it all?”

Let me assure you of this, it is not me that does one thing,

what you see is my trusting Him for everything!

I would not be able or even desire to parent this many without His love, mercy and grace!

my God, my King, my Lord, my Comforter, my Strength – you are the ROCK of my life,

the Shield of my heart and the Protection I need as I focus on winning the race.

A mom, teacher, wife I might be –

but becoming Your child is what set me free!

Your love is what makes each calling my greatest joy,

and when I feel like I can’t go on another day, I sit still and remember to reread Your story!

One filled with promises, love that never ends and victory over it all from beginning to end!

I pray to be used to give life to our home,

filled with songs of praise and joy in our hearts.

God help me to keep my eyes on You -

not what I can do – but what You have already done!

God help me to lay my life down at Your feet,

and live each day powered by Your love.

God help me to see our children through Your eyes,

to not miss a moment and to cherish these years.

God help me to train them in the way they show go,

not because of what I said, but what I have done.

God help me to create a home filled with Your joy,

where mercy reigns, grace overflows and love never ends.

Thank You God for hearing my prayers,

and answering them right on time – with a yes, maybe and often times no.

Father, thank You for calling me friend,

help me to live like Your!

I am a Mom…

From Tots to Teens ~ Summer

I pray that you are all having a bless and fun summer with your children! Summer time has been great for our family!  How many you can’t believe today is August 1st?  I say this every summer - “this season seems to be the fastest one all year!” It has been a time of restoration.

 A time to rest. A time to play. A time to swim. A time to explore. A time to learn new things. A time to master new skills. A time to dig deeper into His truths for our family. A time to learn what love is and means. A time to put our faith to work in our home and lives.

 You all know the story Solomon tells in Ecclesiastes 3 – there is a season and time for everything. And every season must come to end as another one begins. So it is with life.

 We as a family are entering a new season and are learning to embrace every detail God has revealed to us. With this new season comes many new opportunities to trust Him, obey Him, cling tightly to Him, thank Him, praise Him and worship Him. I continue to learn and be amazed at all that God desires to do for us through every season in our lives. Sometimes God will allow the storms and calm us. Sometimes He will calm the storms and bring us peace. Other times He will ask us to look above the storms and up to Him – who will take care of both the storm and us. I continue to learn how precious is His faithfulness in our lives. God is showing us through each of our children, they too enter into seasons and we must learn how to weather them well. As we enter into them together we must learn how to stand strong in His word and truths – not fall into the trap of their behavior. As we walk through the winds blowing around us at times almost blowing us over we must be still and know that He is still God. We must look at our children during the hard seasons and remember a new one is just around the corner. As their rock in the storms of life – we the parents must show them how we are trusting in our ROCK Jesus Christ to see us through them.

God continues to speak to me that I am to be their greatest example of His Son.   That I am to disciple them as He did Jesus.  That everything they need to know about God the Father I will seek out and share with them as they grow in strength and stature.  That until they are able to fly into His arms and love alone – my job is to help them learn all they can to live a life that will glorify God no matter the season they are in.

I thank God seasons come and go.  Because some seasons that we go through as parents of 9 children – several under 5 yrs old – are tough, long and truly take all that I have to give to get through it.   When I am weak He is faithfully strong.   When I am losing my patience He gives me His.   When I am frustrated, He helps me to be long-suffering.  When I am not showering them with His love – He quickly comes in and loves all over me to remind me to pour all that He blesses me with into them.   I am learning to run to God more and more each day to survive this season of parenting.   The summer days can be hot, blistering hot and very long.   However, God always brings a cool summer breeze that washes over me and restores me for another day.

Wishing you the sweetest of final summer days with your children as you prepare for the next season to come.  No matter what season you are in – remember this too shall pass and another season is not too far behind.

 

From Tots to Teens ~ Greater Are You Lord!

What an amazing month I experienced since last writing here!

God has shown up in so many ways in our home and in each of our children.

We say, “God is good all of the time!” “God is faithful!”

Yet, sometimes those words fall off our lips without the true praise, honor and glory God deserves. Or at least they have for me.

However, I have seen the glory of God in our home recently in more ways than I can count!

God doesn’t want to receive partial glory in our lives – He wants all the glory!

Just as He commands, “love the Lord your God, with all of your heart, mind and soul.” Also He tells us, “lean not on your own understanding, but in all of your ways acknowledge Me and I will direct your paths.”

Parenting is NO exception to this rule and promise.

For years I would ask my patient husband, “when will things change with this child?” “I know we are doing things His way and yet, the heart of this child seems to push further away and care less about the things they seem to do wrong or hurtful.” My husband would keep reminding me, “We must continue on His path, His way and trust the Lord to do what He promises with each of our children.”

Sometimes it really bothers me – because my husband is always right. This time I’m glad he wasn’t wrong.

With each of our adopted children there comes a time when challenging behavior shows up. Things that go against the norm in parenting and areas that are not easily corrected. Yet, when you get past the behavior they are no different than any other child’s reason for misbehaving…sin nature and wanting to know that we mean what we say – “No matter what you do we will always love you.” Our children hear that 100’s of times a week in our home. Because someone needs to hear it.

Well, God is saying the same thing to all of us. NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU!

I began reading Alan Melton and Paul Dean’s book – Disciple like Jesus two weeks ago and every page I found my head shaking yes, yes, yes.

This book will not be popular with most – because they sadly don’t want to really be told they are doing it wrong and parenting as the world does. The facts don’t change no matter how hard we try to avoid hearing them, or learning them. Then I began to pray that God would touch the hearts of others to begin reading this book and get it into the hands of leaders of every church. We must not be ashamed of the gospel of Christ – it is life! It is freedom! It is breath to our bones! It is a love story from beginning to end. We must stop looking for feel good solutions to our problems and look to God who is greater than anything in our life! That means the good and the bad.

I’ve read so many parenting books in the last 5 years since coming to Christ. Sure some were good and even helpful. Yet, there always seems to be a hole in each one – and for the first time I think these men did it right. They touch on the real issue and it comes to down to one thing – FOLLOW CHRIST and His every example. NOT one of us can go wrong if we treat our children like Jesus did His disciples.

You see, “God gave His only Son, so that whomever shall believe will not perish but have everlasting life.” John 3:16

We must live like we believe. You believe Jesus is God’s only Son. You believe God raise Him on the 3rd day! You believe His death on the cross paid for all of your sins – past, present and future! You believe that He is the only way to God in heaven. You believe that Jesus is sitting at the right hand of His Father speaking good things about you. You believe He is The Life, The Truth and The Way!

Yet, most of us don’t disciple our children in our own beliefs.

Sure we take them to church each week. Sure they attend Sunday School. Yet, that isn’t enough as far as God is concerned.

We have given our lives over to the world – too busy for real time discipling our children. We have bought into the worlds ideas – our children need to be involved in “x” number of activities to be socialized and prepared for life – more time away from us – more time out of the house, more time driving here and there. I often read blogs and see how busy they are going here and there – the moms are simply losing steam by keeping up with their children’s too full schedules. I ask myself each time, “is it worth it? Why are they so concerned about their children's happiness?” Sure team sports can be a great tool to build character in a child and prepare them for many things in life – but when do we ask – at what cost? Some facts that inspire our family to keep on His path:

“Independent research groups indicate that 75% to 90% of our young people walk away from the church upon graduating high school. Every MINUTE we lose four youth, every HOUR we lose over 200, every DAY we lose over 5,000 and every year over 2,000,000. Our children are walking out the doors of church never to return.

Think about the enormity of losing two million children to the world every year. Something is definitely wrong. Parents are truly blindsided. Of the Americans who call themselves born again Christians, only about 9% have a biblical worldview. The majority lose their virginity by their second year of college. With more than 50% of Christian marriages ending in divorce, the church’s divorce rate is slightly worse than that of secular society.”

Chapter One starts with this fact: “If we think about the fact that almost 90% of our young people walk away from the church every year, we must consider that part of the problem is a faulty process. In fact, it does not go too far to say that the root cause of our losses is a faulty discipleship process that has been used by most Christian parents for decades.

In the average Christian home the total time spent on biblical training is less than five hours a week. With less than five hours of biblical training a week and more than eighty hours (80) of non-biblical training/influence per week from various sources, the non-biblical influence easily wins out shortly after our children leave home. As a result, our children and future generations are lost to the world.”

I love what it says on the very next page: “The world training system we have bought into (as designed by Satan) is the opposite of what Jesus Christ did in making disciples. Jesus imparted biblical knowledge and wisdom, but more importantly, He cultivated deep trust from, heart relationships with, and a lifelong commitment to His disciples.”

Jesus said, “For what is highly esteemed among men is an abomination in the sight of God.” Luke 16:15

And what comes next you have to read for yourself – sorry but it is worth the time because our children deserve all that Jesus gave us – His life!

I highly recommend you checking out their blog and purchasing a copy of their book!

Back to Sunday school and why it isn’t enough? Because Jesus is the example.

Jesus spent 3 years one on one with His disciples. He gave all He had to them. Pouring into them everything the Father told Him to. He loved them. He taught them. He feed them. He performed miracles before them. He prayed for them and with them. He gave them wisdom and taught them how to use it. He didn’t want anyone else teaching them the things of His Father. He did it!

I began reading through the gospels again myself to see all that Jesus spoke. I want to know the words He said so well that they become life inside of me. Because in order to disciple our children like Him – I must know what He asked of each of His disciples.

His words are pretty clear and His commands truly not a burden – love each other, as I love you. Serve others before yourself. Listen more than you speak. Speak in love and truth. Always forgive as you have been forgiven. Lay down your life for your brother. Follow Me and deny yourself. Everywhere you go – tell someone about Me. Share the good news. Give hope to others. If you need anything, ask My Father in My name and it will be given to you. Trust Me. Obey Me. Listen to what I say and then do as I ask because I love you.

Now I really shortened all the wisdom Jesus gives to us – but these words ring in my ears daily and they are the message loud and clear through Disciple like Jesus.

Our goal as parents is to help our children know that they know that they know Great is You Lord! That everything the world has to offer is nothing in comparison to the blessings He will give to them without end!

Walking in His amazing grace!

From Tots to Teens ~ Father's Day

father - [fah-ther]

Father – this word conjures up so many emotions in me and I’m sure most of you too.   Here is a story on the history of Father’s Day.

Some definitions of father are:

• to assume as one's own; take the responsibility of.
  
• a father-in-law, stepfather, or adoptive father.
  
• a man who exercises paternal care over other persons; paternal protector or provider: a father to the poor.

Smith's Bible Dictionary 

Father The position and authority of the father as the head of the family are expressly assumed and sanctioned in Scripture, as a likeness of that of the Almighty over his creatures. It lies of course at the root of that so-called patriarchal government, (Genesis 3:16; 1 Corinthians 11:3;) which was introductory to the more definite systems which followed, and which in part, but not wholly, superseded it. The father's blessing was regarded as conferring special benefit, but his malediction special injury, on those on whom it fell, (Genesis 9:25,27; Genesis 27:27-40; 49:1;) ... and so also the sin of a parent was held to affect, in certain cases, the welfare of his descendants. (2 Kings 5:27;) The command to honor parents is noticed by St. Paul as the only one of the Decalogue which bore a distinct promise, (Exodus 20:12; Ephesians 6:2;) and disrespect towards them was condemned by the law as one of the worst crimes. (Exodus 21:15,17; 1 Timothy 1:9;) It is to this well-recognized theory of parental authority and supremacy that the very various uses of the term "father" in Scripture are due. "Fathers" is used in the sense of seniors, (Acts 7:2; Acts 22:1;) and of parents in general, or ancestors. (Daniel 5:2; Jeremiah 27:7; Matthew 23:30,32;)
 
"It is a wise father that knows his own child." -- William Shakespeare
"Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father!" -- Lydia M. Child
“The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.”--Henry Ward Beecher
“Any man can be a father. It takes someone special to be a dad.”- Anonymous
“It is much easier to become a father than to be one.” - Kent Nerburn

The Bible has many verses on what it means to be a father and the awesome responsibility placed on men to do their job well.

A man who loves the Word of God and Loves the Lord with all his heart and all his soul and all his mind. He would love his wife like Christ loves the Church. He would love his family UNCONDITIONALLY and would ".... provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord." -Ephesians 6:4

"If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father who is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?" -Matthew 7:11

As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him; -Psalm 103:13

A discerning man keeps wisdom in view, but a fool's eyes wander to the ends of the earth. –Proverbs 17:4

A man of knowledge uses words with restraint, and a man of understanding is even-tempered. –Proverbs 17:27

Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged. -Colossians 3:21

Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? –Hebrews 12:7

He will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers; or else I will come and strike the land with a curse. –Malachi 4:6

Here are two posts I wrote for Father’s Day last year here and yesterday here that truly speak of the amazing job my husband Scott does in this area!  that truly speak of the amazing job my husband Scott does in this area!   I am eternally grateful God is using Scott to show me what a “real” father looks like.  I sadly didn’t have a relationship with my father most of my life.  He unfortunately walked away from me again once I took Jesus into my heart.   I praise God that He is unlike my earthly father in every sense of the word. (One of my dear friends Kim wrote this post about being a real father – take a moment to read it here. Share it with your husbands and encourage them!)

I remember the first time I read the following letter and it spoke so deeply to my heart.  I cherish this letter still to this day.    Why?  Read it and see…



No matter what our relationships were like or are like with our earthly fathers, we are all blessed to be loved by our perfect Father in heaven.   There is nothing any of us can do that will cause Him to stop loving us perfectly!   There is nothing we need to do to make Him love us either.   Nothing! 
We as earthly parents will fail many times throughout raising our children.  We will say things we don’t mean.  We will say things that don’t honor God or our children.  We will do things that will have them question our love for them.  We will let them down…in one way or another.   Even so, we can all thank God that He will equip us perfectly to do our job well!    All we must do is stop working at being a good parent and let Him be their perfect Father through us.

The greatest gift we can all give our children is to seek God with our full hearts, mind, body and soul!   To bathe our homes and families in prayer!  To pray for our husbands to lead us faithfully and diligently to God and His best for our families!   To teach them His way and Truth!  To speak His words of love more each day and not settle for anything less than God’s best for them! To lay down our lives for them – not the way the world does it (letting the children rule the home) as God commands us – to serve them well as we raise them to be humble, faithful servants willing to lay down their lives for others too!

I want to take a moment and thank every man that is called father.   I want to honor them by acknowledging the awesome responsibility before them.  I want to honor them by acknowledging all the sacrifices they make each and every day to ensure we and their children are provided for, protected, prayed for and are taught the truths about God!  Thank you.

I want to take a moment and acknowledge the legacy left behind by all the military who will not be with their families this year.  May God comfort each of you and hold you close to Him!  I pray the same for all the families who lost their father’s and husbands this year no matter the cause.  May their memories bring comfort to each of you and help encourage you to draw close to God!

With much love and wishing you all a very blessed Father’s Day!



p.s. If anyone would like a copy of the Father’s Love Letter let us know and a copy will be emailed to you in PDF format.

From Tots to Teens ~ Intentional

I mentioned in a post last month that I read the book The Mom I Want to Be by T. Suzanne Eller and how it truly touched my heart about the legacy I am leaving behind for our grandchildren. Sure that is still about 10 years away from happening but everything I do with and for our children now effects how they will raise our grandchildren. That thought is causing me to get real intentional with my parenting.

Then another book was recommended to me Shame Lifter by Marilyn Hontz and I’m almost finished reading it. This book like the first is touching me in a way nothing has outside of reading the bible. It is cutting through every layer of my heart and any mask that I have put on since I was a child. Some of those masks are not so easy to look at or take off. One by one like an onion God is slowly peeling back the layers I have so comfortably lived behind and in. He is showing me that none of them are who I am to Him or my family. I thought I knew Him a month ago. I really did. I thought I had gotten so far from where I was a year ago even and then this book came, and now I realize how little I truly know the God I gave my heart and soul to. I want to be intentional with getting to know Him and me through His truth! Because what I have been telling myself is selling my children short for who they are to become because of my inner most beliefs.

It is NOT easy to take such a hard look at yourself. It is not fun either. I didn’t set out for it to be easy or fun when I committed this year to trusting and obeying God no matter the cost. The cost this time is letting go and letting God completely. Not an easy task for someone whose life has revolved around me taking care of myself in many different ways to survive or to feel loved. I have gone back in time through 100’s of memories starting from very young all the way to today. Each memory has given me a piece of why I am the way I am today. They have shown me why I react the way I do in any confrontation (i.e. disagreement), when I feel threatened, uncomfortable in different situations, my inability to communicate as easily in person as I can sitting here typing to all of you and why I so desperately need God to parent 9 children.

I see small things already in our children that I don’t like about myself and want to help them now make changes to be successful in areas I have struggled my whole life! You know seeing your sins 24/7 in your children no matter how minor they are begins to tell you that it is time to address them and be intentional about it! Homeschooling your children has a way of speeding up this process as well. Adopting 7 children in less than five years doesn’t slow it down either! We sometimes joke, just count our children and you know God is doing something to work out any selfish behavior in us. Often I hear His still small voice when I begin to feel bad that my plans didn’t go as I hoped or wanted, “Jill it is NOT about you.” Right Lord! Sigh… How many times do I need to be reminded of that fact? I’m not sure I can count that high. So in the meantime I praise God He keeps reminding me that my life is to serve Him and not myself!

A week ago the author of the book:

contacted me to help create and design a new blog for them. When I read his testimony that he shared in the email originally sent to me I knew I had to check out this book. Again, God makes no mistakes in when He delivers what I need to hear and know. Nor does He ever make a mistake when I meet a new person – 9 out of 10 times it is for me to learn something and be challenged in my walk with Christ. I have no doubt in my mind that I’m about to be challenged in a whole new way as I get to know Alan and read his book. I would highly recommend all of you checking it out and spending some time reading the reviews here.

What I see as a big gapping whole in the body of Christ is the complete lack of discipleship going on. It starts with you and me at home. It does not begin at church. It is an intentional choice each day to spend more time with God as a family than we do anything else. It is an intentional choice to pray for and with your children. It is an intentional choice to pray for and with your spouse. It is an intentional choice to train them in His ways which are 100% opposite of the worlds. It is an intentional choice to not raise our children to look, talk and be like the world. It is an intentional choice to teach them the joy, peace, rest and hope that comes from living for Christ, empowered by the Holy Spirit. It is an intentional choice to let them see you walk by faith, not by sight and to let go of anything holding you back from a fuller relationship with God. It is praying for the grace to be sustained through the trial and sickness, not praying for it to be taken away. It is praying for the grace and wisdom to handle whatever you are dealing with today. It is praying to live for today – not the past or what will be. It is living by faith in God with complete trust in His plans for you and your family. It is living a life of holiness – not complacency and showing the world how on fire you are because of Christ’s love for you!

I have shared this before but it is worth posting again because until we all grasp who we are in Christ and the freedom we have in getting to know Him – nothing will change where it counts – in our hearts and homes.

As I begin to fully understand the word intentional - my eyes are opened to see things His way, my heart is softened and ready to do whatever He is asking of me, and my ears are ready to receive it in full obedience. The way to show God we love Him is to become a disciple of Jesus. Follow Him, deny ourselves and pick up our crosses daily. Anything less is not worthy of the cross He shed His blood on to save us.

Jesus said, “Let the little children come to Me.”

No child is unworthy of the good news and it is time we started to live like it is the best news we have ever heard!

The funny thing about all of this is – when I was first asked to write this feature for Totally Tots I thought God’s plan was to use our experiences over the last 15 yrs of parenting, little did I know He was going to use this feature to teach me many things about the greater things to come! I thank God for a place like this that causes me to draw closer to Him and rely on His wisdom. I thank God for allowing me the privilege to share all that He continues to do in my life and our family as we trust and obey in Him more each day. I thank God that there is hope, mercy, forgiveness, healing, grace and love in The Truth! I praise Him for bringing me to my knees once again as I dig deeper into what it means to walk by faith intentionally!

From Tots to Teens ~ A Generation in Need

Last week I wrote a post about the next generation after spending time at Hershey Park with our daughters. A dear reader of mine sent me the following email after reading this post.

While I was eating my lunch, I read 1 Corinthians 1 :18-31
Isn't it true, that for us who are being saved by the cross it really is the power of God! The world thinks I'm so foolish to think I can afford to adopt, but for me it is the power of God working in my checkbook. The world thinks it is foolish to bring my kids to the Philippines, but for me it is the power of God to let them love as God loves and to experience His love in an orphanage. The world thinks it is so foolish for me to home-school, but for me it is the power of God working in my family. The world thinks it is so foolish for me to not earn money, but for me it is the power of God working for my joy. The world thinks it is so foolish for me to be an introvert, but for me it is the power of God working in my peaceful heart as He created me. The world thinks it is foolishness to take your daughter out to breakfast, but for me it is the power of God tying heart strings between me and my daughters. The world thinks it is foolish to give up the mountains and the ocean for a church, but for me it is the power of God working in my life, growing me and healing me from all the foolishness of this world. The world thinks it is foolishness to read the bible day after day, but for me it is the life changing power of God. The world thinks it is foolishness to love in selfless ways, but for me it is the power of God giving me honor and glory.

The world thinks it is foolishness to like me or to want me or to care about me. "But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise, God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things- and the things that are not-to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before Him. It is because of HIM that I am in Christ Jesus!!!!!"

AMEN!

I can only speak from our personal experience and what I know is that unless you begin early teaching your children that He is enough – the world quickly sucks them into believing He is not enough. The world around them is trying to convince them how much they need and deserve.

That thinking and training breeds a generation into believing it is owed something versus believing they can do something worth while or give back what has been so freely given to them.

I have been singing Chris Tomlin’s song over and over again since our trip to Hershey Park* last week and thinking about how important it is that our children see me living this out to its fullest meaning. That I show them He is more than enough for me and them.

I am asking God to show me all the ways that I live in such a way that is not teaching them to look upon Jesus and trust in His all sufficient grace and love - as enough!

The world does believe we are fools for living without things or our lack of desire to keep up with the Jones'. But what they don’t understand is this simple truth – Jesus warns all those who call themselves a follower of His and believe upon Him -

Do not love the world nor the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. 1 John 2:15 and verse 16 continues…

For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh and the lust of the eyes and the boastful pride of life, is not from the Father, but is from the world.

In order to teach our children this truth – we must NOT be lovers of this world and choose to look different and not fit in with what everyone else says is OK, normal and good for us. We must define ourselves by what God says is good, holy, pure and right.

We must raise our children to understand what it means to love all but not desire to be like all.

We must raise our children to understand what it means to live in this world but not become it.

We must raise our children to know the truth and desire to share it with the world.

We must raise our children to seek God’s best and trust His way is to prosper them, a plan for a good future filled with hope!

We must raise our children to believe they are worth more than precious silver or gold.

We must raise our children to dress in such a way that honors our King and Father in heaven.

We must raise our children to be wise and discerners of truth, good and evil.

We must raise our children to use God’s word in love to build others up and give them the hope in Christ Jesus.

If we do anything less we are training them to fit in with the world. We are training them to be enemies of God and seek the things that will surely burn when they stand before Him one day.

Honestly friends, no matter how much you wanted something and how hard you worked for it – sooner or later it lost its worth and importance to you.

Things of eternal importance never lose their value or worth.

We are not teaching our children to work for His approval – because it is already earned – Christ paid the full price for their lives! We are teaching our children they are working from that dept paid and His unfailing love for them. They don’t have to be the like world trying to earn more, get more and be more – they are already worth more to God than anything this world could ever offer them or us.

Isn’t it time we starting to live like our worth?

Time for each of us to wear our royal crown and live worthy of our King - walking in His grace and love – for all to taste and see just how good our God is!

I would love to hear from all of you – how can we come alongside this generation and help them become the change we all want to see?

From Tots to Teens ~ Dear Mom

I am reading a wonderful book that I pray you all take a moment to look at and consider to purchase for yourselves. Or you can ask for it as a special gift just for you.

I am almost finished reading it and outside of coming to Christ, learning about grace, being refined through 7 adoptions in only 5 yrs and homeschooling 5 of them this year – this book is changing how I look at my calling as a Mom. What I have not shared with you here is that I did not have an easy childhood. I did not grow up in a Christian home, nor did we ever speak about God or pray to Him. I was verbally and physically abused. Although my mom to this day does not like to acknowledge that she did any of that – my broken heart for so many years tells a very different story than she cares to remember. I had thought I forgave everything anyone has done to me. I truly did, until I began teaching through Praying the Names of God on our family blog and reading this book. As I got to the chapter on forgiveness I wept silent tears until the real ones came. This was two weeks ago and I’m yet able to read that chapter without crying.

I am not just weeping for me. I am weeping for my mom who never knew what it felt like to be unconditionally loved and safe growing up. I am crying for our 7 adopted children and their birth mothers – some are alive and a few are now deceased. I am crying for every child out there who feels unloved, is unsafe and each day wakes up hoping today is going to be a better day. I’m crying for every child who thinks they have to be a perfect child and never mess up to be loved. I’m crying for every little girl who is being abused today by someone they love and trust. I’m crying for every little girl who is now on the streets being sold instead of loved. I’m crying for every child who is alone in the world and has never known the love of a mother. I’m crying for all of you who long to be a mother some day. I am crying for all of you who like me didn’t have the ideal childhood or relationship with your mothers growing up. I am crying for each of you who still don’t realize your struggles as a mom come from a broken place deep inside of you. I am crying for the broken marriages you witnessed or experienced yourselves and how that effected you and your siblings…and how it is effecting your marriage and children today. I am crying for how it keeps us from truly trusting God and His complete unfailing love for us. I am crying for the way the pain lies to us and convinces us we are not worthy to receive the love of God, from our husbands and worse our children. I am crying for the way the pain has a way of hiding deep inside and until you truly are ready to lay it all down at God’s feet the healing He came to do can not happen. I am crying for those of you who are still trying to be strong on your own, control things, fix things, manage everything and be everything to everybody. I am crying for the little girl inside of you that just wanted and wants to be loved to her core.

I am that girl and have been set free for the first time in my life. And let me tell you all something really big! I will never be the same and neither will our family. My marriage is being restored to greater heights, our children are healing in ways they never could because I was unable to give or receive the truest form of love – purely! Our home is shaping up to be the home I prayed it would be but never able to see how to get there. God is moving mountains and changing how I think, feel and act. As I seek to do this – I am struggling and messing up royally. Thank God for His grace and the grace being shown to me by my husband and children. I am have humbled myself many times in the last few weeks before them all asking for their forgiveness. Because the only legacy I want to leave behind is one that is whole – not what I have tried to keep hidden or tucked so deep inside, or fix on my own, or fooling myself to believe that I could ever be the mom I wanted to be without leaving the past truly behind and at the feet of Jesus. That my friends is simply impossible. However, all things are possible with God and for God!

Mother’s Day is a hard holiday for me – because I go shopping for cards and none match how I feel inside about my mom. None match what I want to say or how I pray she would receive it. It has taken me a long time to realize that she did the best she could. Through adult eyes and my heart filled with His love – my heart breaks for the life my mom has lived and all the ways she still has yet to know the peace that surpasses all understanding. I have finally come to the place where I have forgiven her and want all God’s best for her. I don’t blame her anymore and honestly pray she finds the same healing I have today!

I am now able to break the cycle that was passed down to me and was almost passed down to our children (not in the same way or degree but nevertheless still unfair to them, because I wasn’t whole – they were only getting half of my love). I pray they grow up and remember the day Mommy changed forever!

God has given me the most precious gift in my mother-in-love and I can never thank Him enough for her love. The most beautiful thing about her is this…after she read the post I wrote about her last week, she emailed me the sweetest note to say - “Jill as I read your words it was like going to school and hearing this rave review of your child and thinking, ‘are they talking about my child?’ that is how I felt reading your words about me.” I quickly wrote her back saying, “every word I wrote is true.” Her humility is one more gift to me and how she continues to bless me in ways she still doesn’t understand!

I began to look up bible verses that are encouraging to us as mom’s, grandmothers, and foster parents, as women, His final creation. I often ponder that thought, that He created us last with a purpose and a very unique and special plan for us.

Here are some of the verses I do believe will encourage us all as we travel together parenting His children to know His unfailing love!

• But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint. Isaiah 40:31
• Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: Proverbs 31:28
• "Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all." Proverbs 31:29
• She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. Proverbs 31:26
• For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11
• Even in darkness light dawns for the upright, for the gracious and compassionate and righteous man. Psalm 112:4
• As a mother comforts her child, so will I comfort you; and you will be comforted over Jerusalem." Isaiah 66:13
• Then He went down to Nazareth with them and was obedient to them. But His mother treasured all these things in her heart. Luke 2:51
• Be strong and take heart, all you who hope in the LORD. Psalm 31:24

If you would like to read more verses on encouragement – click here.

Here is a letter I pray encourages each of you on this Mother’s Day to press on towards the goal of Christ Jesus and never give up hope.

Dear Mom,

Happy Mother’s Day! I love you!

Here are some things I want you to never forget:

God made no mistake in giving me to you. You are the perfect Mom for me. God will always help you take the best care of me. Promise to stay close to Him and ask Him to help you when I am not so easy to like. Please seek His wisdom, and trust in everything He tells you to do. He won’t lead you in the wrong direction. He loves you mom just as much as you love me, even more!

Please don’t get discouraged or give up on me when I disobey 100 times and ask you the same thing over and over again. I’m learning to understand trust, love and patience. Please don’t get discouraged when I forget what you just told me to do. It is not your fault and I really do care about you. Please don’t buy into my eye rolling or yucky faces when you ask me to do something. Simply look past them, write them off as a phase and continue seeking to push through to my heart.

Please don’t take my lack of thanking you for ungratefulness. Teach me to say thank you more. Teach me to write you love notes so that I will always do that for others when I am big just like you.

Please don’t let my testing you push your button so deep that you begin to give up on getting through to me. I need to know you are going to be there forever no matter what. I don’t mean to hurt you - so when I do, teach me to apologize quickly. I want to grow up and make you proud of me for being an honorable, and humble person. I want to bring glory to God in all I do and need you to help me learn humility when I mess up and hurt anyone with my words or actions.

Please keep reading me the bible and teaching me things about God’s love. Even if I look bored or you think I’m not listening to you, I am. One day I will be able to use the truth to empower me to withstand the temptations of the world.

Please consider how you speak to Daddy and the way you treat him in front of me. I am watching. You are teaching me more with your actions than you do with your words. I am learning how to be a wife/mother or father/husband as I watch you both. Please don’t believe what the world tells you about marriage and that the answer to fixing a problem is to get a divorce. I don’t want to live without either of you and need you both to raise me to be the person God desires that I become. Please teach me to pray for my future spouse and marriage. Please let me hear you pray for Daddy. Please let me hear you say kind words about him to your friends and our family. Please let me see you humble yourself before God (when Daddy doesn’t do the right thing or maybe hurts you) trusting God to provide the healing you both need. Please don’t lean on your own understanding -trust in God’s love for you to see you through whatever life brings your way.

Please don’t buy into my act when I demand to have things my way. Please don’t give me everything I want. Please teach me that anything worth having is worth waiting for and working for. Please don’t let me order you around and demand you make me something else to eat. Please teach me that everything you prepare for me is a gift from God. Please teach me that I am blessed to have anything before me and God’s blessings should never be despised. Please teach me not to be selfish and to help around the house. It will make me a better wife/husband some day. Please teach me that you are not my entertainment committee and that is OK to be bored or play by myself. Life is full of dull moments and I need to know how to get through them gracefully, without constant complaining.

Please teach me to serve others and pray for those less fortunate than me. Please teach me to see past the color of someone skin, clothes they are wearing and how they speak. Please help me to learn to love everyone like Jesus does. Please help me to care for the homeless, the voiceless and the widow. Please help me to honor God by honoring you and Daddy. Please help me to not get away with sinning against you and most importantly God. Please take the time to correct my behavior and teach me the way back to God’s way.

Mom, please teach me the gift of forgiveness and to never let the sun go down with a bitter heart. Please teach me to never trust in man above God. Please teach me to stand on the truth and use it in love. Please teach me to not judge others, lest I be judged. Please teach me to be a doer of the word, and whatever I do be sure it is all for His glory. Please Mom pray for me, and teach me to pray for you. Please teach me to always look up to God and walk in the power of His love for me. Please teach me that I have nothing to fear -that God is for me, not against me.

Mom, please remember that no matter what I do over the years or how much I make you believe I do not care about you, or that I know more than you – we both know that is not true and that I do love you more than I will ever probably be able to share. Mom I need you to help me become all that God has planned for me.

I don’t want to let another day go by without you knowing all of these things. Because today is your special day and I thank God He gave me you! Teach me to always honor you not just today but every day-because just like I am a special gift to you, you are a very special gift to me too. And when you mess up, simply say, “I’m sorry.” So I will learn to say, “I’m sorry” too.

I love you Mom,

Your Child

I wrote this letter to myself and will keep it close where I can see it! So that during the times when I struggle to do all the things I know God is clearly asking of me I will remember why I am doing it all – the 9 blessings He has entrusted me to train up in the way they should go. My only goal is to hear, “Good job, well done, My faithful servant.”

Happy Mother’s Day! Walking in His love with you!